I hate the question “What do you do for a living?” because it shrinks a whole person into one job title. A single answer can’t capture the messy, beautiful layers of real life.
Why It Feels Reducing
People ask it as small talk icebreaker—easy, automatic. But I’ve learned the hard way that life isn’t defined by work. Take me: yes, I’m an environmental professional by trade. That’s just my 9-to-5, and I’m very passionate about what I do.
The rest of me lives as a writer spinning homestead stories, a homesteader pulling winter carrots from frozen soil, a mom wrangling morning meltdowns, and a caretaker tending clucking chickens, strutting turkeys, and pigs rooting through the mud (who will hopefully farrow for the first time around Mother’s Day).
These homesteading roles shape me equally—maybe more. The question pretends otherwise.
Who It Leaves Out
Worse, it sidelines anyone without “traditional employment.” Stay-at-home parents, caregivers, homesteaders, creators between gigs—they get frozen out. Conversation stalls: “Oh, nothing?” as if their days lack value.
I’ve watched friends flush, stammer, or deflect. Motherhood is full-time labor. Homesteading demands innovation daily. Caretaking livestock like pigs and chickens builds worlds from scratch. Why does a paystub trump that?
Better Questions Exist
When cornered, I say: “I protect land by day, grow food and stories by life.” But I’d rather flip it: “What lights you up outside work?” That uncovers the human underneath.
People are mosaics, not labels. Next time you’re tempted, ask about passions instead.
Practical Homesteading: growing food, raising kids, building community.
What’s YOUR most-hated question? Share below! 🔥 I bet we can rewrite the script together!
If this resonates, like + share so other multi-role makers feel seen! 💕 Tag someone stuck in job-box conversations.
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